I got me a future...

"I'm trying to get better because I haven't been my best." - Frank Turner

After a few days of feeling better, I crashed in epic fashion. Not only did I come off the rails, I went down the embankment and kept rolling off the edge of a cliff before eventually landing in a pit full of deadly despair vipers.

I have been a very naughty boy, and have been a bit mean to my ex and her new squeeze to say the least. I think we have an understanding now though.

I've also been a burden on my friends the last few days, and I'm going to repay their kindness by fixing myself.

I'm working on me. I have to take away the power my situation has over me. I have to take control of my own feelings and behaviours.

I've taken a couple of weeks off work and I've signed up to counselling. My intention is to adapt, improve, and find a measure of happiness again.

I will be honest. I'm not looking forward to Christmas. It was a struggle to get the shopping done and get the last presents. I'm sure it will be just as hard to finish wrapping as well. It will all be done though! For the boys!

I'm starting to feel calmer now. I've revised my plans and I'm taking action. My diet and exercise is on the back burner for a few days while I find some equilibrium but that's no bad thing. Gives me more time to sit and eat Pringles!

I am endeavouring to look past my now and towards my future. A better future. I'm hoping the only way is up now.

Fingers crossed!